Curiosity Builds Bridges Between Generations
Yesterday, I was invited to lunch with the “Lunch Bunch.”
The Lunch Bunch are just a group of retirees that get together for lunch to fellowship and to hear from a staff person to get to know them better.
The ages range quite a bit and the conversation does as well.
I was asked to share anything I wanted about me, but it couldn’t be about ministry.
I have to say, it was so fun to be with that crew and to interact with some folks I don’t always get much face time with.
Tuesday, I was asked to visit a couple who were prepping for a surgery.
My standard “on call” day is Tuesday, but it has been a while since I have been on a call with someone.
This time was a specialized surgery for an 88-year old to help her have a bit more mobility.
As she was checking in and getting ready, I visited with her husband.
We had interacted cordially at church and exchanged handshakes and pleasantries regularly, but we had never had a more in depth conversation.
As we chatted, I learned so much about him, his wife, his family, his work, and his place in the story of our community.
It was my “job” to visit, care, and pray for a surgery patient, but Tuesday morning, I was refreshed by my community with my two greater friends.
I’m not sure I would have predicted that I would have had such a reflection about these two interactions this week, but two things became abundantly clear to me:
Healthy curiosity leads to healthy community.
When we start with a posture that illicits curiosity, we position ourselves to receive; to learn; to understand. One of the greatest hindrances in our society today is an inability to listen and understand.
We listen to make our retort. We rarely seek to understand a person’s story and what informs their perspective if we don’t agree with their perspective.
In this case, I was so grateful to listen and learn so much from these folks that were older than me. And they have so much to share, through their stories, and the generally don’t even realize how their story is influencing and impacting.
Ask more questions. Hear more stories. Learn more lessons. Grow in deeper community.
2. Generations need generations to grow.
There is so much that older generations have to offer to younger generations. There is much that younger generations have to offer older generations.
I find it interesting how often I hear of the need for intergenerational community but see little effort to press through the awkward to execute the connection.
So much of my life is spent with younger generations. Generations that are typically organized into learning situations. Generations that have vitality and energy.
As those generations grow into life a bit, they begin to long for the investment of older generations. They rarely say those words, but they typically find themselves holding fast to people of older generations who make themselves available to being questioned and being willing to share their scars.
Additionally, when I interact with older generations, there is a care and concern for the younger generations. It can sometimes come across as crumudgeonly statements that sound more like Clint Eastwood getting you off his lawn than investing in the lives of young people.
What I have come to realize is this: If we want to see generation gaps bridged we have to start moving through the awkward and the uncomfortable to the place of collective collaboration. The place where we share our stories and we welcome the work of finding understanding and growth.
So find someone of a different generation this weekend. Ask some questions. Get past the awkward. Cultivate a deeper community. Build the bridge.
